As the calendar turns and we welcome a new year, many of us feel the familiar tug of expectation. The start of January often brings with it a flurry of resolutions, goals, and promises to ourselves—some realistic, others less so. While the idea of a fresh start can be motivating, it can also carry a heavy emotional burden, especially for those of us navigating mental health challenges.
January is often painted as a month of transformation, but it is also one of the darkest and coldest months of the year. The festive cheer has faded, daylight is limited, and many of us return to work feeling depleted rather than refreshed. This contrast between societal expectation and emotional reality can leave us feeling overwhelmed, anxious, or even defeated.
New Year’s resolutions, though well-intentioned, can sometimes reinforce feelings of inadequacy. The pressure to “fix” ourselves or make drastic changes can imply that who we are now is not good enough. When we may already be struggling with low self-esteem, low mood, and/or anxiety, this message can be particularly damaging.
Social media can amplify these pressures. We can become bombarded with images of people at the gym, starting new diets, or launching ambitious projects. It is easy to compare ourselves and feel like we are falling short. But what we often do not see are the struggles behind the scenes—the setbacks, the doubts, the days when motivation is nowhere to be found.
A more self-compassionate approach to the new year may be more helpful, fruitful, and rewarding. Rather than setting rigid goals, consider intentions that reflect your values and emotional needs. For example, instead of “lose weight,” we might try “nurture my body with movement and rest.” Instead of “be more productive,” we might try “make use of my energy levels and take breaks when needed.”
It is also worth remembering that change does not have to start on January 1st. Although slowing down over the festive period is great for reflection, growth is a continuous process, and meaningful progress often happens in small, quiet steps. There is no deadline for self-improvement and no shame in taking our time and doing things in our own way.
If January feels heavy, you are not alone. Many of us experience a dip in mood during this month and it is okay to seek support. Talking to a therapist can help to explore our feelings and develop strategies for self-care that are sustainable and kind. Therapy is about understanding and reflecting on what matters to you, free from judgment or pressure. Whether you are grappling with New Year’s expectations or simply trying to get through the winter, therapy can offer clarity and comfort.
This year, let’s work towards redefining success and a the constant message that we need to change. Let’s celebrate resilience, rest, and authenticity. Let’s honour the complexity of our emotions and give ourselves permission to be imperfect. If we are to set a new years resolution, a helpful one might be to be more self-compassionate.
January does not have to be a month of pressure and self-criticism. By approaching the new year with self-celebration, gentleness, and realistic expectations, we can create space for genuine growth and emotional wellbeing for the entire year. If you are finding this time difficult, know that support is available and you do not have to face it alone.
